Call me a hater, but at least I’m not stupid..

“Hello beautiful women! Without replying to this message, put a heart on your wall; no comment, just a heart. Next, send this message to your women friends, only women. Then, post a heart on the wall of the person who sent you this message. If anyone asks you why you have so many hearts on your wall, don’t tell them. This is only for women, because this is breast cancer research week. One small act of solidarity between women.”


You may have received this message from your Facebook friends, you may even have participated, well, I’m just going to have a little rant about it ok?

The idea that posting a heart emoticon on your Facebook wall is an “act of solidarity between women” and that not explaining what it means, is for breast cancer “awareness” makes me want to projectile vomit.

Breast cancer awareness isn’t some sort of you-go-girrrl club. It’s likely that as a breast cancer sufferer, you’re going to be supported and loved by a husband, brother, father, uncle or son, that you’re going to receive care from a male nurse, doctor or orderly, and that part of the funds supporting your treatment was raised by men through “breast cancer awareness” campaigns.

And explain to me how keeping the reason behind this so-called ‘act of solidarity’ a secret is going to achieve any long or short term good for breast-cancer research? Is it raising money? Is it even raising awareness (outside of your circle of “beautiful women”)?

This campaign is just as ridiculous as the “change your status to a country/fruit/something suggestive” campaigns that are also supposed to raise breast cancer awareness, even though you’re not allowed to explain the purpose to anybody not apparently part of club.

If you ask me, these ridiculous “campaigns” do nothing except demonstrate that you’re a bit of a numpty. If you really want to raise awareness and show solidarity with other women, why not post some links to your page, raise some money or volunteer your time?


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3 Responses to Call me a hater, but at least I’m not stupid..

  1. Anne says:

    As a breast cancer survivor who’s next door neighbour is fighting round THREE of this cancer, I find these messages help those of us who have been ‘blessed’ with the affliction to see that people do care.
    Yes – donating cash etc might help, but honestly having some one send you a message on line (no matter how generic or twee) or by phone, even sms, does have the ability to make you smile, and believe me, when going through all the surgery and the chemo and radiotherapy, a smile really helps.
    That said – I rarely participate in the mass posts, but find it heartening to see how many do.

    • fattimah says:

      Anne, I’m glad these messages make you feel better, but half the time (particularly with the status change ones), the meaning isn’t obvious until somebody somehow includes you in on the chain…or you go do some research when you think your friends are all going mad.

      I just think that if people really want to cheer up their friends (even in a generic way), they can make it much more upfront. And actually make an effort to raise awareness rather than being silly about it.
      And I wish you every best wish for your health and to your neighbour. 🙂

  2. dropjohn says:

    I’m not overly fond of these messages, though at least they’re not as offensive as the ‘save first base’ (‘save the boobies’, ‘save the tatas’, etc) memes . They *do* nothing, other than create a false and superficial feeling of solidarity (‘o, look. we’re doing *something* and it’s a *good* thing and we’re doing it *together*!’ Gak). Well meaning and utter laziness – really, what have you *done*?

    As for raising awareness – as you point out, it hardly raises awareness if it’s a *secret* meaning meme. Besides which, most of us are already aware, tyvm – I don’t see how you could *not* be at this point – and the deliberate exclusion of men is to our shared detriment.

    If you want to aid the fight against cancer, give to research. If you want to help out those with breast cancer or help better their chances of survival, give to support organizations; give to Planned Parenthood; volunteer – figure out how the skills or services you have can be useful to those in need. There’s always something you can do. Give directly, don’t buy rubber bracelets and pink ribbons.

    All the pink ribbons in the world, all the facebook memes, all the t-shirts and rubber bracelets – while I can appreciate that they may have the best intentions in the world behind them, and while some may find them heartening, they don’t help *me*.

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